Ok, I'll admit it. Caffeine is a drug, and I am an addict. A big one. Pepsi is my drug of choice. Some people have coffee, or a bagel, or do yoga in the mornings. I have a Pepsi.
Every once in a while I feel guilty and decide to cut back. It never lasts long.
Other times I am forced to cut back. Like the last few days. I ran out. I figured it wasn't a national crisis, as I'd just run to the store to get some more. Well, life got in the way, as it tends to. Over the course of the next day or so a new person emerged. We'll call her Withdrawal Mommy.
Withdrawal Mommy is not pleasant. She is sluggish and unmotivated, yet quick tempered. She tends to yell a lot, and then complains about having a headache. It's not pretty. It finally reached critical mass last night. Withdrawal Mommy's headache was turning into a full fledged migraine, and the little pills that normally fix that, turned into back stabbing little pricks and decided to not work any more. And, it was dinner time and there was a house full of hungry mouths to feed.
Withdrawal Mommy looked at the kitchen from her chair in front of the computer. There was stuff to fix, but that would involve, you know, work. So everyone was loaded into the car and sights were set on Taco Bell. Why Taco Bell? They have. . . .Pepsi!
We went through the drive thru and ordered, and then I pulled into a parking space to dole out the food. After all the little mouths were taken care of, I ripped off my straw wrapper, plunged the straw into the lid, and brought the drink up to my mouth. One sip of that cold refreshing crack, and my headache literally melted away. I took another long draw, and then closed my eyes and sighed in pleasure. Withdrawal Mommy disappeared back into the nether regions of my mind.
I have a new respect for what people trying to get off of major drugs go through. I now understand the feeling of hitting bottom, and craving that one thing, and feeling like you'd do anything to get it, just so you can feel better. Not caring that it isn't good for you, and you may regret it later, just wanting to get rid of the headache and get back to what is your normal.
I am just lucky that caffeine is not illegal. So. Lucky.